July 7, 2025
Dear Dementia,
Continuing the thoughts from last night about family, I must say I do know some people who are grateful for your presence.
A few years ago I met a family where you broke down the door and placed yourself at the kitchen table. You brought so many problems, lost and broken dreams, financial strain, but you did bring one thing. You brought unity to a family that was broken. Siblings found themselves shifting from warring to laughter. If you didn’t show up, the family would never have been reunited. A gift of you, a gift of dementia.
The problem?
They felt guilty. Shame for needed you to reunite the family.
I can understand this feeling. The internal monologue about, “Why could we not get through this without something ‘tragic” occurring?” The conversations about lost years, experiences, because of the rift that now is only intensified because it took until you showed up for unity.
We must remind these individual that they don’t need to feel guilty and shame about the event that brought them back together. Instead, we can show them how they can make the most of this new chapter even with you having around. We can invite them to make the most of the memories that remain for they could have easily not have occurred at all.
Until tomorrow,
Kate
