It is no secret I have a weakness for hot chocolate.
It is still my hot beverage of choice, long after my peers switched to a daily coffee habit. So what does hot chocolate have to do with dementia? Everything and nothing at all.
Nothing at all? Our lives do not become a compressed, medical version of ourselves when dementia enters the picture. So moments for play, a treat, or a visit from a loved one should never become a line item on the care plan or viewed with a medical lens. It should happen simply because, and enjoyed for the beauty of being in a relationship with a loved one.
Life is made up of Moments. Dementia does not change this; these moments become more important with dementia. They are moments of joy, sorrow, care, and faith. So make some hot chocolate in your favorite mug, sit down, breathe, and savor the moment.
On this cold gloomy day, I feel we need a Hot Chocolate Moment.
We are looking over the cliff that can be referred to as, “sparkle season” “the most wonderful time of the year,” the “holiday season.” It has as many names as there are feelings about the holidays.
One thing I hope you don’t feel during this time of year is dread. Navigating this time of year while living with dementia journey, or experiencing a string a firsts without your loved one, it is hard, but if we reflect on the reason for these holidays, we can find hope.
Thanksgiving – to be thankful for what we have. We can feel everything has been stripped from us, and yet blood is still running through our veins, our lungs are still taking in air. I think we have forgotten how to look for the positive in the loss and sadness because we fear the label of “toxic positivity” that people might accuse us of expressing. I say, let them! Where there is a speck of life and a glimmer of beauty and goodness, there is somethig to be thankful for this year.
Christmas – the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ. The beauty, the joy. Christmas does not need all that our secular world tells us we need. We don’t need a “Ralph Lauren Christmas.” We don’t need a thousand gifts under the tree. And, we don’t need an “aesthetic theme” to our decorations. If all we have is a moment to focus on our Lord and give thanks for His coming, we are celebrating Christmas to its fullest beauty.
So, breathe, take a sip of your favorite hot beverage, and trust that you don’t need what the world tells you that you need during these upcoming weeks. That you decide how to give and how to celebrate this season. I simply invite you to find moments to be happy, to see more beauty than you typically would see, to create more moments of joy with loved ones than you might be inclined to create. Celebrate life, even in the loss, trials, uncertainty.
