It is no secret I have a weakness for hot chocolate.
It is still my hot beverage of choice, long after my peers switched to a daily coffee habit. So what does hot chocolate have to do with dementia? Everything and nothing at all.
Nothing at all? Our lives do not become a compressed, medical version of ourselves when dementia enters the picture. So moments for play, a treat, or a visit from a loved one should never become a line item on the care plan or viewed with a medical lens. It should happen simply because, and enjoyed for the beauty of being in a relationship with a loved one.
Life is made up of Moments. Dementia does not change this; these moments become more important with dementia. They are moments of joy, sorrow, care, and faith. So make some hot chocolate in your favorite mug, sit down, breathe, and savor the moment.
Take a breath, make yourself a mug of hot chocolate, and pause.
I almost forgot to post a Hot Chocolate Moment for this month. My goodness! Well, in my defense, I did give up my daily hot chocolate for Lent and only broke that promise 3 times. So my habit, but not the moments were on pause.
What is your greatest fear? Is it death? Is it illness, pain…snakes? We often avoid what we fear because we are unsure of what we might face, we want to stay in a place of comfort. We hold with a death grip the past and the way it was, knowing that it is no longer our reality. And so, we sidestep, dance around, and avoid entirely that which we fear. In doing so, we are removing ourselves from the possibility of joy, laughter, greater connection, and beautiful moments. Unless we are talking about snakes here, then go ahead and hide, because nope! Those creatures are terrifying. But for those of us that close the door to connections with our loved ones living with dementia, we are saying no to all the wonderful, awe-filled moments life brings.
I have witnessed a growing fear of visiting loved ones living with dementia, mental illness, physical health needs, and cancer. In almost every conversation I have, someone is saying they didn’t visit because of fear, sadness, and uncertainty.
If you are afraid to visit your loved one, to face death, to face illness, why? Have you ever taken that to prayer, a conversation with a close friend, or in writing in your diary? If not, I encourage you to do so in the coming weeks. Allow yourself to feel the discomfort of facing what you fear, of uncovering how you can grow through it. Once you put this into practice, document in photos, writing, music, the arts, or simply a list, the many joys, moments of laughter, and beautiful memories you have created because of your saying, “yes” to pushing through that fear.
Cheers to Friday! Find a moment to enjoy life with loved ones and those you care for this day.
